I absolutely love the musical Hamilton, and these lines from the protagonist’s wife hit me like a sack of bricks. Her husband is relentlessly working all the time, obsessed with the goals he has, and never able to slow down.

Look around, look around

Look at where you are

Look at where you started

The fact that you’re alive is a miracle

Just stay alive, that would be enough

I don’t pretend to know

The challenges you’re facing

The worlds you keep erasing and creating in your mind

But I’m not afraid

I know who I married

So long as you come home at the end of the day

That would be enough

How would you feel if someone told you that? If someone accepted you for who you are right now? They saw all the effort you put in, all the strain and pressure you face, and just wanted to hold you close regardless of how your goals played out? If you were good enough today, and didn’t have to climb the metaphorical mountains you think define you?

The fact that would mean a lot to me means I have more work on acceptance that I need to do. Love is supposed to be unconditional. For self, for spouse, for the friends that really matter and really love us back. It’s not about fixing ourselves or earning the right to be good enough. We can give ourselves that acceptance. But it takes practice, and most of us aren’t there yet. 

Still, the excerpt above really speaks to me, and reminds me that acceptance is a skill worth learning. Maybe someone else needs a reminder too.