Being in a relationship is hard. Being alone is hard. Improving yourself is hard. Feeling stagnant is hard. Excelling at a job you’re passionate about is hard. Drifting through a job you hate is hard. Choose the path you’ll be proud you took later. It’s all hard anyway.

The part of this that makes me feel exceptionally dumb is when I have a really hard work week followed by a chill weekend. I’ll be working frantically throughout the week, stressed to the max, and completely exhausted by Friday. I’ll have gotten a lot done, learned new things, and usually accomplish my goal, but it’s chaotic and it kicks my ass. 

Then the weekend comes. I stare at the wall. I choose not to do anything because I want to relax. I don’t like Netflix or video games so I just scroll through Reddit or indulge in escapism. Honestly, I don’t like sitting still. I will complain all week about how busy I am, and then when I have a chance to breathe I get frustrated that I’m bored.

There are a few different kinds of dysfunction we could analyze here. I should manage my workload better so it doesn’t feel like stressful chaos. I should also get better at sitting still. I should do a lot of things. But the point is that both of these things that are hard for me are chances to grow. Why complain if I can use them to better myself?

What I’m trying to do lately is spend less time thinking about what is hard and spend more time thinking about “What will I be glad I did later?” On those hard nights working late, it is very tempting to drink some wine to relax. But that’s a bad idea when you work late 5 nights a week. Recharging on the weekend is a good thing, but not if you do it in a way that you regret.

You know what else is hard? Taking out the recycling that has more wine bottles in it than anything else. Or seeing that your favorite clothes don’t fit anymore because you use food as a coping mechanism. Or missing other goals you set for yourself because numbing yourself seemed easier than doing the hard thing.

I’m not trying to attack anyone here. I’m just solving my own problems on paper. Everything is hard. Life is hard. Capitalism is designed to suck us dry. Our lizard brains are getting fried from social media dopamine. And eating junk food is way cheaper and easier than eating what we’re supposed to. Social media makes us so insecure that maintaining relationships and building new ones is harder than it’s ever been. The only easy path is giving up and I really don’t think either of us wants that.

There’s some hard things that we’ll be really happy we finished (if we can finish them). This is just a reminder to think hard about how you’ll feel tomorrow. Everything is hard, what’s worth the effort?