Author: Matthew Voss
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How I Learned Self Acceptance
Are you one of those lucky bastards? Born accepting yourself? Never struggled with inadequacy, never worried if you were good enough? Maybe no one ever gave you a reason to doubt your self-worth. I’m jealous, to be honest. Very jealous. Well, this post isn’t for you. Move along. Maybe you don’t accept yourself, and you…
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Small Steps Forward Every Day = Reliable Dopamine. Don’t Wait for the Finish Line.
Have you ever had a goal where you thought “my life will be so much better if I can just cross this one finish line”? That’s pinning a lot of hope on something you can’t always control. That’s assuming life is inadequate until some arbitrary box is checked. That kind of finish line moves as…
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Gratitude Is the Cure for Envy
To everyone that doesn’t live in a big city: do me a favor. Look up at the stars tonight. Look up at a sky without light pollution, and appreciate all of the beautiful salutations of stars from millions of light-years away. Cherish it, marvel at it. Honestly, I feel a little bit cheated because you…
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Take More Miniature Vacations
There’s a beautiful lake close to my apartment, with nice chairs on the east side. I like to go there at sunset with a Topochico and sip my fizzy drink while I watch the light shimmer on the water and colors migrate across the sky. I don’t know why, but this miniature vacation does a…
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How to Build Momentum: Make Small Promises to Yourself and Keep Them
Are you upset that you keep missing goals you set for yourself? Are you angry that you keep repeating the same mistakes? Me too. That is basically breaking promises you made to yourself. It erodes self-worth, it makes you hate yourself, and it paints a damning picture of the future. If you break enough promises…
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Hate Being Alone? You Might Need a Pet More Than a Partner
My therapist told me to get a cat. I didn’t understand why until I got into my next relationship. And when it got worse and worse, and when kept putting off the breakup, I realized if I’d had a nice cat at home I wouldn’t mind not having a partner. Partners and cats are not…
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There’s Some Problems You Can’t Think Yourself Out Of
How many times have you been worried sick about a problem, turned over restlessly in bed all night without sleep, and had the exact same problem 8 hours later when the sun came up? A bunch? Yeah, me too. Honestly, there are some problems where over-analyzing just doesn’t help at all. Sometimes the best answer…
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What Are You Optimizing On?
Have you met someone that was super career focused before? They worked tons of hours, gave up their social life, and sacrificed their health, all for a promotion or fancy title? They were optimizing on their career. If they are lucky, their employer recognized them for it. But by focusing so much on one area…
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Just Because They Suck at Texting Doesn’t Mean They Don’t Like You
Does it make you feel sad that your friends don’t reach out? Or that they take forever to reply? Maybe it seems like they don’t care. Like if they really wanted to talk to you then texts and calls would be effortless. Well…The good news (and the bad news) is that you’re wrong. I think…
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You Need To Make Your Life More Boring
If you really want to achieve your goals, I’m sorry but you’ll need to make life boring. The best luck I’ve ever had is small steps forward every single day. I didn’t work myself to death, far from it. I chiseled out a little bit of time for each goal, and I followed the exact…
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What Is Stopping You From Moving On?
Who we are changes over time. The things you used to want might not be important to you now. Old friends might not be good for you anymore. Look at the plans you used to have. Do they still make sense? Do you still enjoy working towards them? Changing over time is often a good…
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Three Reasons To Start Putting Yourself First
Filter Out People Who Use You Putting yourself first means saying no sometimes. It means taking time for yourself is allowed and you don’t always have to be available for someone else. It means finding out who is okay with you having needs and who is not. These aren’t bad people, but they aren’t really…
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Where Is Your Happy Place? When Are You Going Back?
There’s a beautiful lake close to my apartment, with nice chairs on the East side. I like to go there for sunset with a Topochico and sip my fizzy drink while I watch the light shimmer on the water and colors migrate across the sky. I don’t know why, but this little self-contained experience is…
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Who Could You Send a Smile to Today?
Do you think you could send someone a thoughtful text today? Tell someone how much they mean to you. Express gratitude. Check on someone. Trust me, it’s worth it. Wouldn’t you like to receive such a message? You have an immense power to create joy. To make someone feel special. To remind them they are…
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No One Is Holding You Back – You’re Making Excuses
“I can’t workout or go for hikes because it will make my wife/husband feel guilty/insecure.” “I can’t eat healthy food because my friends want to eat at a burger place.” “I have to do irresponsible thing X because my friend doesn’t want to do it alone.” Here’s the punchline: Doing what is right for you…
Millennial Anxiety 